From Anger to Trust: My Journey Through Nigeria’s Election
The Nigerian election season had left me feeling disillusioned and hopeless. Despite never being interested in politics before, the events of the EndSars movement made me rethink my apathy.
The presidential election came and Nigeria really “Nigeriaed”. As a first-time voter, I was shocked to discover that the process was far from transparent. This left me shocked and uncertain what to expect (well, I certainly knew who was going to be “declared” winner)
Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, the gubernatorial elections rolled around, and I was in for another rude awakening. I was denied my right to vote because I “looked like I was Igbo.” I still don’t know what that means, but it was a blatant case of discrimination and voter suppression. To make matters worse, a thug physically assaulted my aunt and me, leaving me in a state of shock and anger. I mean, I heard stories, but I never saw it happening to me.
Despite these challenges, I found myself invested in the elections in Plateau and Kaduna states. spent hours refreshing my phone for updates and eagerly awaited the results with bated breath. When Plateau state’s results were finally announced, it brought a glimmer of hope to my heart, and I became even more eager to know the outcome of the elections in Kaduna state. But as the announcement was repeatedly postponed my hope began to wane, and I felt anxious and uncertain. This is Nigeria, when they begin to postpone things, there’s a problem.
Finally, the results were announced, and my heart was broken. I was devastated and angry at the world. I felt like my love tank was empty and was ready to have an outburst at anyone who crossed me. I couldn’t understand why God didn’t do anything. If not for anything, how about the regular deaths of Christians in Kaduna state? I was in a rage and was constantly muttering, “Why Abba?” To say I was angry is putting it lightly, I saw red.
And so, while journalling the next day, I was just telling God about how I felt about all these and how pissed I was and why I thought that he should have intervened, I mean, Christians are dying right? I was writing with so much pain in my heart and then God asked me a question,
“Yetunde, do you love these people as much as I do?”
It was a wide awakening. You see while I was getting mad and beginning to doubt the things that God had said ahead of the election, God brought me to an awareness, in my head it sounded like “You no fit love these people pass me now” (You cannot love these people more than I do). And it brought me to an understanding that made me less angry.
I cannot love the people of Southern Kaduna more than the one that created them. I can only love them as much. God sees what is happening, and He understands the pain that we are going through. We may have fresh questions for God, but we must trust Him with our safety and that of our loved ones.
I had two options, I could either choose to trust God or continue being angry even though I knew my anger could not change anything. It was a moment of realization that I couldn’t control everything and that I needed to have faith in God’s plan. Trusting God didn’t mean that everything would be perfect, but it did mean that I could find peace in knowing that He was in control.
“…unless the lord watches a city, the watchmen stand guard in vain…” — Psalms 127:1
If you’re feeling discouraged and angry like I was, I want to encourage you that there is hope. I pray that this post has brought you a little bit of relief and has reminded you that you’re not alone. It’s okay to feel frustrated and upset, but don’t stay there for too long.
So, I pray that you are able to trust God wholeheartedly and come to a place of peace, even amidst the chaos and injustice. I pray that you are able to trust His sovereignty and goodness even when we do not understand everything.
If you enjoyed reading this, please clap as many times as possible. (By many times, I hope you know I mean 50 times). I would also really like to hear from you so please leave a comment.
